Waiting for fall

The first day of fall felt like summer. Even with the rain, it felt like a steam bath. I guess it's good in one way---sweating off the pounds. Yes, I still think about that and wonder why it is now so hard to lose the extra pounds. I know I have to stop obsessing about it. Yet most of the advertising time spent is spent on exercise machines (I call them torture machines) and diet products. I cringe when I think of all the time and money spent to try to get thinner. Some of it is good. We all do need to be more aware of our food intake...what we're putting in our bodies. This is especially true when you discover that most of our eggs, poultry and other food products come from unsanitary conditions. (At least that's what you hear from those who know.)

Autumn is my favorite time of year. I love the colorful leaves, the nice cool breezes and the smell of burning leaves. I still recall the time I went to a bonfire the community was having to celebrate. I wanted to bring marshmallows, but chickened out at the last minute. There is nothing to compare to listening to the fire crackle and feeling its warmth touch your face.

Materialism-Do we make time for God?

I went on vacation last week to a place that prides itself on holding onto the past. In the downtown area, there are signs everywhere that the people want to make changes. We are a nation that forever likes to live in the moment, forgetting the past and foraging into the future. Yet we feel a pull to go back to those simple times. Our past has a lot to teach us. It can't define us. We can't be so focused on living or trying to live in a past that we have no part of living.

Hence the struggle...a big part of that past is what we really need to bring back to life. We forgot God to our drive to gather more stuff to satisfy the huge hole in our lives. We look for the next best thing, little realizing that we forgot the very one that gave us our being. I noticed the churches that peppered the area and mourned. Not even the website for the place mentions the presence of these churches. Where has our faith gone? Have we given up on God?

I long for the days, seems like a lifetime ago, when the churches were alive and growing with people. I still remember the days after that horrific day in September 2001 when a mini revival started. What happened? Has time washed away the revival?

Fears relieved or Faith emboldened

My sister and her husband made it home safely from Bermuda. The big scary hurricane heading our way averted the shoreline and made its way out to sea. I thank God for his mercies that are new every morning. I'm now planning another trip myself. I felt it this morning as I struggled to work...that need to get away and relax for a time. I will have a lot to think about and mull over during this time away. I know that I need to let go of my fears for the future. I need to believe that God is in control. Yet, this is hard to do. I let myself get carried away by my worries. I have to stop that. I have to let God be God. If I don't, then it's like giving up or even worse...rejecting God.

I long for the day that I will meet God. I hope that he will say to me...

"Come into your own, thou good and faithful servant."

I know I don't deserve anything from God. None of us do. I marvel though at his grace towards us. His sacrifice for me leaves me breathless. I know that my faith is weak, yet I also know that he uses the weak.

A fearful reality or dreams gone bad

I know it's a sin. Yet I do it all the time. I recall what the word says and am comforted in knowing that I'm not the only one. You may do it as well, even though it doesn't do any good to do it. You're probably wondering what I'm talking about by now. It's worry. I let my fears get the best of me, carry me away and scare me. Right now I'm worrying about my sister and her husband. They went to Bermuda on Saturday when Hurricane Danielle was churning towards that area on a cruise ship no less! I tell myself that they are having the time of their lives and that it will be a very memorable experience. Yet the fearful reality is that they're on a cruise ship in rough seas...yikes!

Then I worry about finances. I'm guessing that a lot of people are. I should be content that the Lord is providing for me, yet I see so many people out in the streets. Their dreams have gone bad. It frightens me, as I realize that I could very well end up like that. I thank God daily for what he's provided for me. I know I don't deserve half of it.

Reflections and memories

How often do we reflect on the things that matter most? For some of us, it's almost never. We take things too much for granted. I know I have done that. We can say that we forget too easily the way or that we ignore what is right in front of us. That's not good. Ignoring what's in front of us can make us blind to what's just around the corner. Maybe that's our lot though...to be blind. Yet, I can't help thinking that it doesn't have to be that way. We do have someone in our corner that can lead us.

We remember him, and reflect on the words he spoke through his word. How? In our daily struggle, we should stop to reflect and remember his promises to us. They are marvelous promises, given to us to sustain us through this world. I often think about the promise that one day all things will become new. Some days I wish for it to happen soon. Other days I realize that he has perfect timing and that he's waiting for those he called to come to him.

A Summer Wish

Seems like only yesterday I lazed around dreaming about my future. I still recall the lazy summer days spent dreaming, walking and thinking about life. I didn't know then about the world and all its troubles. My mind was free. I was a child. Being with my little niece, Aydia, awakened those feelings in me. She is so young, and the world is a free and friendly place to her. She doesn't know about all that is waiting in the wings to drag her away from that carefree existence.

Like the slow, relentless beat of the drum, summer wears on and soon passes. For some of us, the ending of summer means a new chapter in life. Aydia is experiencing that new chapter now and it's a good thing. Yet, sometimes I long for time to stop. It seems that it goes way too fast. I hardly have time to take it all in.

New Beginnings and Partings

Recently I noticed more and more that I seem to be growing out of the person I was and into a new person. I'm a lot more outgoing and open than I used to be. Yet I still feel that tug of wanting to hide myself away. I don't want to part with that quiet, shy person I once was. I hate the changes I'm going through now. I know they are a necessary part of life. I also know what many say about this period of change. I can't stagnate and stay in the past. Yet sometimes that's exactly what I want to do. I look at my older brother. He has withdrawn more and more into himself every year. He lives in the past, wishing that everything would turn back to that simpler time.

Sometimes I do wish that things would remain the same...that no one would leave for "greener" pastures. I'm sure we all dream that things would at least slow down. Changes happen at too great a speed. It makes my head spin. They tell me change is good. Growth is good. You should look forward to new beginnings. I do. I look forward to the time when all things will be new again and I will see my Lord face to face. Yet I'm also scared. I know that I haven't been the best servant. I freeze and look the other way when I know I can't do anything to help. I ignore the cries of the homeless and hungry. I admit that freely, and that's what scares me. I fear that because I do that, that the Lord will turn away from me. That would shatter me....and break my heart. Then I remember that he promised never to leave me.