Reflecting on Loss and Moving On

This was the first birthday I celebrated without my Dad. I know we didn't do much. I'm not much of a "party" person but it did feel a bit weird not having him around. People do say that the loss of someone you really depended on will hurt more than the loss of someone you really didn't know. My mother's sister died a week after my father. I never met her.

Father's Day this year was rough. I am grateful that my family rallied around me. We focused more on birthday celebrations with a little time for remembering Dad. I grieved when the video my little brother took was finished. I realized however that my Dad suffered a long time. It was over a year, but the last four months were the roughest as he was confined to a hospital bed. I also realized that it was time for him to go. He had suffered enough. I do recall a couple of times now that he questioned why he was still around. God knew that he had something to do. I was taught some valuable lessons and I think the time spent with my family made us stronger.

I can't say that I'm ready to move on. Grief is a process that sometimes takes years. I know in some ways I do have to move on. I can't wallow in despair or hopelessness. God has blessed me with good family and friends.