If you have been following this blog for a little while you probably know of my struggle. It is hard to keep moving when it seems that everything is going south. I have tried time and time again to hang onto that ray of hope. You know that it is increasingly more difficult to find the good in all the rubbage that is flying around. I would justify myself for the trapped feeling I have whenever I try to find some purpose in my life.
The Lord knows my struggle. I know that he is in control but sometimes it is very hard. I look diligently trying to see outside my own little world. I know that I don't want to go back to what I was, a very selfish and self-centered person. Yet this world's message keeps hammering away. It tells me that I shouldn't be thinking of others, but have the mentality of "me first." It also keeps telling me that I'm too old and too run down. I sometimes feel myself agreeing with that statement. I do feel like I'm being torn in two balancing between two different worlds.
I do have to remind myself that I am created in God's image. I am his daughter. He has me in the palm of his loving hand. Jesus has overcome the world. I was created for his glory, not my own glory.
Yet I am still so selfish. I have difficulty saying things and struggle for the right words. I selfishly want that feeling of doing something meaningful and name worthy. I know it is a struggle we all face. We don't like to admit it. We shy away from it. We may even reject it outright by trying unsuccessfully to be pious. I have to be honest. Yes, I sometimes love attention. I like being the center of attention too.
It is hard when you feel the walls closing in on you. You wonder if you really actually belong anywhere. You do. God has placed you where you are for a reason. You do have a purpose in life. Keep looking for that ray of hope as it dawns. Stop struggling with stuff you can't understand. Thank the Lord for each day.
Tuesday, May 14, 2019
Tuesday, April 30, 2019
Growing Pains: The Church in Transition
It was rumored that another huge change was coming four months ago. The relatively new pastor at the church I regularly attend made a very strong suggestion to combine the two Sunday morning services. The church had made a radical change about ten years earlier to split the traditional Sunday service into a contemporary service and a traditional service. The contemporary service would serve the needs of those who felt they weren't being served by the traditional service. In other words, they were bored out of their minds and rebellious. I don't blame them, but it did create some issues that weren't present before. The contemporary service relaxed the discipline and morals that the traditional service enforced. It allowed for more freedom to worship whatever way a person wanted to worship. It deluded the message considerably.
The traditionalists, at first, weren't happy about the change. They saw what was happening to the church and the message. Some balked and left the church to find another church that still had traditional services. Others stuck it out, figuring that they should embrace the new ways of reaching others for Christ. They liked the fact that there was still room for them at the church. They also liked the fact that they could still stick to the traditional service at the traditional time. Unfortunately, church leadership noticed that traditional service attendance was declining a few years ago. There were still people attending this service but many were senior citizens set in their ways. The traditionalists, in other words, were dying and no one was replacing them. The young with a few exceptions were being steered away from the traditional services with their authoritative settings and serious tones. It isn't surprising. The moral decay of the outside world is affecting the church in a big way.
It was decided about two years ago due to the decline in church attendance to change things up. For the first time in the church's history, the traditional service time would change from 11 am to 11:30 am. The contemporary service would move to 9 am with the Sunday School hour in between. It worked but once the new pastor came on board, he wanted to change it once again. He couldn't do it that first year as he was still getting settled in his new position. It wasn't until he served two years that he decided on some more radical changes.
The changes included forcing people to "shepherding" groups designed to make people embrace new theologies and break barriers. It also included the elimination of some old habits that were hampering the church's growth. Some changes were good. The church really does need to reach out to the community more. This huge change, however, will alienate the remaining traditionalists by flipping the church service to an earlier time and creating a forced social time between church and Sunday School.
The traditionalists, at first, weren't happy about the change. They saw what was happening to the church and the message. Some balked and left the church to find another church that still had traditional services. Others stuck it out, figuring that they should embrace the new ways of reaching others for Christ. They liked the fact that there was still room for them at the church. They also liked the fact that they could still stick to the traditional service at the traditional time. Unfortunately, church leadership noticed that traditional service attendance was declining a few years ago. There were still people attending this service but many were senior citizens set in their ways. The traditionalists, in other words, were dying and no one was replacing them. The young with a few exceptions were being steered away from the traditional services with their authoritative settings and serious tones. It isn't surprising. The moral decay of the outside world is affecting the church in a big way.
It was decided about two years ago due to the decline in church attendance to change things up. For the first time in the church's history, the traditional service time would change from 11 am to 11:30 am. The contemporary service would move to 9 am with the Sunday School hour in between. It worked but once the new pastor came on board, he wanted to change it once again. He couldn't do it that first year as he was still getting settled in his new position. It wasn't until he served two years that he decided on some more radical changes.
The changes included forcing people to "shepherding" groups designed to make people embrace new theologies and break barriers. It also included the elimination of some old habits that were hampering the church's growth. Some changes were good. The church really does need to reach out to the community more. This huge change, however, will alienate the remaining traditionalists by flipping the church service to an earlier time and creating a forced social time between church and Sunday School.
Tuesday, April 23, 2019
Christianity Under Attack: Signs of The End Times
I have to admit that I hadn't really thought about Christianity being under attack until my Sunday School teacher mentioned the brutal attacks in Sri Lanka on Easter Sunday. You might think that I've been living under a rock not to notice how Christianity has become a dirty word for the masses. You may also think that what's happening now worldwide is perfectly normal. We all are what some say are "undercover" Christians. We don't toot our horns about our faith. We don't push our beliefs on others. Yet every day I read something else about how our faith is being ridiculed by those who just don't understand.
I can't help thinking that itching ears and wandering souls are part of the problem. The current generation doesn't have the anchor that we had when we were young. Their itching ears follow the most enticing stuff and end up wandering through the wasteland. Some were taught that the established church was holding them back. It is true that there is some moral standard that the church used to teach. It is also true that the moral standard provided a solid foundation. In most churches, especially those that have succumbed to the pressure to make the church more accessible, moral standards have been lost.
I have tried to understand why Christianity is under attack. The more I dig the more I find that it is not the watered down church that accepts everyone that is under attack. These churches have lost their way because they have decided to cater to the desires of the masses and sacrifice their principles. I believe that the churches that were attacked both in the US and overseas had a couple things in common. They decided to remain true to biblical morals and reach out to those who would listen.
I don't have an answer for what will happen next. God does. Yes, we do have to put on our armor and be ready to defend our faith. Yes, there may be a time when we'll have to choose to continue our walk with God despite the consequences. No one ever said the Christian life was easy. Preachers that preach this are wrong. I know I can't do anything on my own but God lifts me up. I am praying for the families and friends affected by the attacks on Sunday that they may know peace.
I can't help thinking that itching ears and wandering souls are part of the problem. The current generation doesn't have the anchor that we had when we were young. Their itching ears follow the most enticing stuff and end up wandering through the wasteland. Some were taught that the established church was holding them back. It is true that there is some moral standard that the church used to teach. It is also true that the moral standard provided a solid foundation. In most churches, especially those that have succumbed to the pressure to make the church more accessible, moral standards have been lost.
I have tried to understand why Christianity is under attack. The more I dig the more I find that it is not the watered down church that accepts everyone that is under attack. These churches have lost their way because they have decided to cater to the desires of the masses and sacrifice their principles. I believe that the churches that were attacked both in the US and overseas had a couple things in common. They decided to remain true to biblical morals and reach out to those who would listen.
I don't have an answer for what will happen next. God does. Yes, we do have to put on our armor and be ready to defend our faith. Yes, there may be a time when we'll have to choose to continue our walk with God despite the consequences. No one ever said the Christian life was easy. Preachers that preach this are wrong. I know I can't do anything on my own but God lifts me up. I am praying for the families and friends affected by the attacks on Sunday that they may know peace.
Tuesday, April 16, 2019
Preparing For Easter: A Season of Rebirth and Recommitting Life
Yes, I can readily admit that I am at the stage in my journey where I'm ready for a change. Life has been really hard over the past year and a half. I have lingered in the valley wondering if I'd ever get past the grim reminders of my past mistakes.
Yes, I know that the past can't affect me if I don't let it. I have been reflecting on Jesus' actions and words during Holy Week. I realize that I have been very selfish. I allowed myself to sink into the "woe is me" mode. I haven't given of myself to anyone.
Yes, I see how Jesus died for me. I realize that I don't have to wallow in the pit of despair and despondency. I can recommit my life to his service. I don't have any idea what that will entail right now. His sacrifice for me is more than enough.
No, I won't give in to the world's temptations. I can't live in the darkness anymore. I will try not to hold onto the things that weigh me down. I am ready for rebirth and renewal.
No, I won't let go of the hand that stretches out to me. I will embrace the love he has for me. As I prepare for Easter I realize that the most important thing is that he lives. I serve a living God. I serve a God who cares for me and loves me unconditionally.
No, I am not crazy. I love the Lord. I will not be afraid to say so. I will not hide or pretend that I'm someone I'm not.
When I think about the Easter season I praise God for his gift. He has blessed me more than I could possibly repay. He has given me new life in his son, Jesus Christ. May you all know the blessings that I have received and the freedom I know in my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.
Yes, I know that the past can't affect me if I don't let it. I have been reflecting on Jesus' actions and words during Holy Week. I realize that I have been very selfish. I allowed myself to sink into the "woe is me" mode. I haven't given of myself to anyone.
Yes, I see how Jesus died for me. I realize that I don't have to wallow in the pit of despair and despondency. I can recommit my life to his service. I don't have any idea what that will entail right now. His sacrifice for me is more than enough.
No, I won't give in to the world's temptations. I can't live in the darkness anymore. I will try not to hold onto the things that weigh me down. I am ready for rebirth and renewal.
No, I won't let go of the hand that stretches out to me. I will embrace the love he has for me. As I prepare for Easter I realize that the most important thing is that he lives. I serve a living God. I serve a God who cares for me and loves me unconditionally.
No, I am not crazy. I love the Lord. I will not be afraid to say so. I will not hide or pretend that I'm someone I'm not.
When I think about the Easter season I praise God for his gift. He has blessed me more than I could possibly repay. He has given me new life in his son, Jesus Christ. May you all know the blessings that I have received and the freedom I know in my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.
Tuesday, April 9, 2019
A Local Fight for Open Space: Struggle for Relevance
It all comes down to money. No one seems to understand that. You throw enough money at a situation all the walls come down. You may say that you're fighting for open space. When it all comes down to the facts that the owner has every right to do what he or she wants with the property. They can: build and develop the landscape, leave it as open space or a combination of the two.
You may struggle for relevance because "sacred ground" doesn't hold when you are talking about a property with extreme development pressure. It comes down to money. You wave enough money at people and they will crumble. It doesn't manner that you're left with nothing.
Yes, I do support the people that are fighting for their open space. It is important to them. Unfortunately, it doesn't translate well enough to make a solid case to keep the land. The land isn't creating any revenue as it is. It doesn't serve any purpose. You may argue that keeping that open space increases the value of the property. I can't help but feel that they are fighting a lost cause. It all comes down to money. No one grasps this completely. Why? I don't know.
I'm still hoping for a good outcome here. I pray that the residents will win the battle for their open space. I just can't predict what will happen. It does seem messed up that these elected officials weld so much power. It also doesn't seem fair.
You may struggle for relevance because "sacred ground" doesn't hold when you are talking about a property with extreme development pressure. It comes down to money. You wave enough money at people and they will crumble. It doesn't manner that you're left with nothing.
Yes, I do support the people that are fighting for their open space. It is important to them. Unfortunately, it doesn't translate well enough to make a solid case to keep the land. The land isn't creating any revenue as it is. It doesn't serve any purpose. You may argue that keeping that open space increases the value of the property. I can't help but feel that they are fighting a lost cause. It all comes down to money. No one grasps this completely. Why? I don't know.
I'm still hoping for a good outcome here. I pray that the residents will win the battle for their open space. I just can't predict what will happen. It does seem messed up that these elected officials weld so much power. It also doesn't seem fair.
Tuesday, March 26, 2019
Fighting For Freedom: The New World Order
We should have expected it. We didn't. The environmentalists under the guise of saving the planet have rallied around Agenda 2030 which allows the UN to take over all the world's governments. At first, it will be voluntary to get to sustainability levels of production. Governments will voluntarily push their citizens to accept the rationing of certain substances.
We should have listened. We didn't. We were distracted by things that just don't matter. We saw the evidence of disasters that scientists have said are worse than ever before now. The agenda says that we have to act now or risk losing everything. Yet it is false. Freedom loving people won't stand for UN control of their government to save themselves.
We should be fighting against this global control. We aren't. America has been weakened by the pressures that the global union has set in place. They have ignored us because they think we are weak. Will they listen to us? I fear not. The agenda is set. The global union will go forward to create this new world order without us.
I read this article: UN Summit Seeks "New World Order" to "Transform the Way We Live" and felt sick. There is nothing to be done here. They are going ahead with this whether or not the US goes along with them or not. There are many in Congress that want this New World Order. They just don't understand what they'd be giving up here. I admittedly am a bit frightened by the ramifications of these actions, but know that God is in control. He controls the environment. He brings people in power and he knows my every need.
We should have listened. We didn't. We were distracted by things that just don't matter. We saw the evidence of disasters that scientists have said are worse than ever before now. The agenda says that we have to act now or risk losing everything. Yet it is false. Freedom loving people won't stand for UN control of their government to save themselves.
We should be fighting against this global control. We aren't. America has been weakened by the pressures that the global union has set in place. They have ignored us because they think we are weak. Will they listen to us? I fear not. The agenda is set. The global union will go forward to create this new world order without us.
I read this article: UN Summit Seeks "New World Order" to "Transform the Way We Live" and felt sick. There is nothing to be done here. They are going ahead with this whether or not the US goes along with them or not. There are many in Congress that want this New World Order. They just don't understand what they'd be giving up here. I admittedly am a bit frightened by the ramifications of these actions, but know that God is in control. He controls the environment. He brings people in power and he knows my every need.
Tuesday, March 19, 2019
A Loss of Freedom: Fugitive State
We heard a lot about the loss of freedoms lately. We also heard that climate change will be the death of us. We understand that many of the colleges and universities are getting rich while young people sink in debt.
The fugitive state is here. The forcing of vaccinations on all citizens is being pushed through Congress. Giving money away so no one will balk. I've been really trying to process all of this stuff. I do feel a bit lost. Will we live in a dictatorship when it's all said and done? I don't know.
I can't focus on the crazy stuff anymore. I try to remain sane.
The fugitive state is here. The forcing of vaccinations on all citizens is being pushed through Congress. Giving money away so no one will balk. I've been really trying to process all of this stuff. I do feel a bit lost. Will we live in a dictatorship when it's all said and done? I don't know.
I can't focus on the crazy stuff anymore. I try to remain sane.
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