Showers of Blessings

The Lord has blessed me in so many ways. I have come to realize that a number of things I have taken for granted are mine because he has been gracious to me. I thank God for my family. I thank God for my friends. I thank God for everything he has given me.

I thank God for challenges, realizing that if life remained routine I would soon wallow in complacency thinking that everything I've achieved was due to my puny efforts. I don't want to wallow in complacency, nor do I want to remain in the pit of despair. I've been there far too much lately, blaming everyone for things they couldn't control.

The meaning of Christmas isn't in the gifts we receive. I realize this. It is in the showers of blessings I receive from knowing others and the feeling I get when I know that I've made a difference in someone's life.

I haven't felt that way for a long time. Frankly I blamed my interia on economic and social trends. I wanted, and still long for meaningful work that supports me and my family. Yet, I can't help thinking that I need to step away from this attitude and move forward towards what the Lord has for me. He has placed some ideas in my heart, and asked me to step out in faith.

It won't be easy. I do have no place to go but up now. I am almost at the end of my strength, but the Lord gives me hope. I can grab onto that hope and spread it around to others.

Faith In Action-Blessings of the Season

The nativity scene never grows old for me. When I watch the pageant with the children I get a new perspective every time. I see that faith in action of these children who have faithfully come to practice the pageant year after year. I am blessed by their innocence and the joy I see in their faces.


I marvel as I contemplate what it must have been like that first Christmas morning when the angels came to proclaim Jesus' birth. The more I learn about Jesus, the more I want to learn. Sometimes I'm overwhelmed by the love God has for me that he would send his son to die for me.

The world may increasingly grow darker as the message dims. More and more churches are foregoing these scenes. It is hard to grasp why there isn't more people coming out to support these children. What message are they getting for that? Yet I see that faith in action. It's the faith of a community that longs to maintain stability in a world that wants to rip things up.

I can dwell on the negatives or I can focus in on the positives. God has given us blessings this season. We can rejoice in the hope that we have in him. We can hold onto the good, instead of wallowing in the evil. We can act in positive directions, not negative ones.

I do have hope. I see the hope in these young people as well. They are the ones that need to know that God offers hope and salvation to those who ask for it. I thank God for that hope that blooms in each heart this time of year.

Learning to Be Grateful

It isn't easy to be grateful. The weight of the world falls on your shoulders. Sometimes it feels as if you're in a deep, dark hole with no way to get out. Grateful feelings don't come naturally. They come because someone does something that uplifts you. They come when you realize things are not as bad as they seem.

I could let fear drive me. I won't do that. Learning to be grateful is hard work. It takes determination and sense that you have someone in your corner. It takes learning to trust in God, and hoping for a better future.

It's not good to bottle things up. When you start thinking positive, and let the negative feelings go...things will change for the better. I admit that it has been extremely difficult for me lately to be grateful. Things pile up. You stuff them in, putting on a mask and trying not to panic. Sometimes though you have to let it out.

I am grateful for the opportunities I've been given to express myself like this. I am grateful for family and friends. I am grateful that I am loved. I am grateful for shelter, food and electricity. I am grateful for water, relatively good health and knowledge.

Making the Most Out of A Bad Situation

I'm learning gradually to make the most out of my current financial situation. I've given up feeling sorry for myself. I've also tried to make the best out of the world's situation. It isn't as bad as it seems. There is a light at the end of this very dark tunnel. I have to believe and hope that God loves me.

I know that there are still some things that I can do to make things better for myself and for my family. I can't give up on them even when it seems that they have given up on me. I don't blame them. I feel their anguish with the situation. It does pain me that I can't do anything about it. I'm completely burnt out.

The only reason I keep going is because of the promises God whispers to me in his word. I know I need to trust him and his timing. I can't let fear and despair overwhelm me. Love casts out fear. I know this, yet sometimes I'm still afraid.

It is a bad situation. Some would even call it dire. I honestly don't know what to do. There is no viable solution to the increasingly difficult situation I find myself in today. Some days I wish I could wave it all away and go back to the relatively stable situation I had seven years ago. Then I felt secure in knowing that I had a position that would last. I was receiving enough to support myself and my family. I had no worries about what would happen once my savings was gone. I was free to dream. My family was in good health and I felt good too.

Yet there are so many things I would have missed....friends and acquaintances I would have never known had I remained where I was. Yes, I am in a bad spot right now. I have hope through that the Lord will see me through it.

Giving Thanks and Being Grateful

Giving Thanks In All Circumstances is what we must do daily. It may be difficult with everything that is going on in the world. However when we give into the fear, we defeat the strong purpose God has in our lives. We let others dictate how we should feel. We allow the cares of this world to swallow us up.

We could wallow in self pity now. Looking at this photograph, some would say that the forest in it is dying. Others can look at this photograph and see the beautiful fall colors knowing that this is only a temporary death. The trees will grow their leaves again come Spring.

Much like the season of my life now. There are some things that are dying. I know that winter is coming when nothing will grow. Sometimes those thoughts scare me. No one wants to grow old...but we all do.

We need to give thanks to all the seasons of our lives realizing that in each season there is beauty to be had and enjoyed. We need to be grateful for what we do have in our lives now and not yearning for something more. As any of you that have been reading my blogs know I've been going through a particularly rough patch in my life these three and half years. I've had a time when I tried to push my  feelings down and pretend that life was going on pretty much as it had been. The shrinks call it the denial phase. I've also had the "fighting" phase where I tried my hardest to find some way out of the situation. I admit that in some ways I'm still fighting and unable to accept things the way they now are. It hasn't been easy to let go. I sometimes still long for that time when I felt secure and had a "9 to 5" job.

Yet I can't help thinking that if I hadn't be in the situation that I now still find myself in...that my eyes still would have been closed to all God has planned for me. I can be thankful for all the friends and acquaintances that I met over the past three and half years that helped keep me sane and focused. I can be grateful for opportunities (even if they are not paid) to help others understand their rich heritage and preserve local history. I can be thankful for the support I've received from so many businesses and individuals to bring a vision that much closer to reality.

I can thank God for leading me to people that can help shape the vision I have to help young people realize and embrace their heritage. I thank God for his presence in my life and in my family's lives.

Wrapping My Mind Around The Tragedy In Paris

I'm still a bit numb. Almost overnight our freedoms have been taken away from us. It isn't hard to grasp the seriousness of the situation with some men still on the loose. Yet I can't help thinking that  allowing the government to raid your home or your place of business at any time sounds like something a dictatorship would do. What freedom will we lose if we allow searches and seizures to happen just because someone suspects something? I can't help thinking that it is too easy to point fingers and tell lies about someone without incrimination.

I am still wrapping my mind around how easily everyone seems to accept this "status quo" in order to catch an elusive prey. I hurt for the victims, but I hurt more for those who will be wrongfully accused of the heinous acts without recourse. Will they have a voice? I don't know. It all seems scary until you step back and realize that God is in control. He knows the situation and the hearts of the people involved. They will all be revealed in time for their deeds whether good or bad.

I do believe that this incident, tragic as it is, is probably only the "tip of the iceberg." We do need to prepare ourselves as Christians for what's coming. Our fellow Christians is Syria and the Middle East have already seen the first fruits of the tribulation that is on the horizon.

In some ways Obama is right. We can't condemn the Syrian refugees. To do so would be to repeat the tragedy of WWII when we refused the Jewish refugees. I admit that I am frightened by the threats, but I have to leave my fears in God's hands. He will open a way.

Reaching a Crisis and Moving Forward

I haven't been writing these blogs for the past two weeks. I went through a crisis. It wasn't very pretty. Crisis never is. I won't go into details about what happened. I'm still sorting out the "why" and trying my hardest not to fall apart at the seams.

All families go through these crisis. It doesn't make it any easier, especially when it's someone you love that is going through it with you. There are days still that I'm in denial. I want things to go back to the way they were before the crisis, even though I know that they can't. I want someone to wave a magic wand and make it all go away. It just isn't possible.

I am moving forward. I have to. There is no way back. I keep telling myself that it can't get any worse, even though I know that it can. Some days it really hurts. I feel frustrated and alone. I know others feel that way too. I tell myself to reach out to them and let them know what's going on. My tongue is stuck in my mouth. I feel frozen. I don't want to feel this way. In fact I'd rather feel like I was in control...little realizing that I was never in control.

The Lord knows my needs. He knows how I'm feeling and the stress that has created so many issues in my life. He wants me to lean on him. Yet I sometimes resist. The way is scary and unknown. I may be forced to do some things that I never thought I'd do. I have to trust him to hold me up and not let go. I have to depend on him to give me shelter and food. I can't depend on my own resources.

I am moving forward in faith. God does have a plan for me. He knows where I should be and what I should be doing. He will guide me if I let him. I just have to let him and get out of the way.