Tuesday, July 23, 2013

Weary and worn....longing for home


I thank God that the heat wave finally abated, but I'm weary. I feel worn out. Too many worries press themselves around me. Sometimes I just feel like burying my head in the sand. I long for my eternal home. I don't want worry anymore about my dwindling funds, what I'm going to eat, if I'll have a roof over my head a month from now or if I'll still be free to do what I need to do.

I know I do have to stop focusing on my own needs. I get myself in trouble with that a lot. I can't see the people around me because I'm too busy feeling sorry for myself. I can't do that anymore. Honestly there is no reason why I should continuously harp on my current situation, dire as it is. No one will listen.

I know what I need to do, but I feel so weary and worn. I can't sleep. I know God loves me, but I also know that he expects me to reach out to others and tell them. I struggle with this daily. How can I reach out to others? God's word also said that their ears will be closed to the old ways. They will not listen. Yet I must press on, just like I am with this job search. Somebody...somewhere needs someone like me with my unique talents....Here I am....is what I need to say....not no...I can't do it. Seriously? You can do this.

I just want to go home.....to my Heavenly Father. I stay because he wants me to stay.

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