I am realizing that I need to really focus on finding that elusive job. With my father's death this past May I have taken on some responsibilities that I really didn't want. I have also blamed myself for how things happened with the WAWA project. I know now that I need to let go. I can't blame myself or wallow in self-pity. I have a few more tasks to do before I let go completely.
I am moving forward. I can't wallow in the past but need to make decisions for the future. I know that my financial situation is still critical. I am praying for sustainable work that I can do. I also still need to care for my mother.
I am stepping away from the historical preservation fight for a short while. I do need to refuel and refresh my spirit. I am still very much interested in history and love architecture. I am going to take some time to read some recommended books on the subject. I do need to focus in on the architectural aspects and put them in context with the whole story. I am going to stop making excuses. It doesn't help to say that I can't do this or that.
I am going to remain confident as I move forward with my dreams. I do have hope. I believe that I can do whatever I set out to do. I admittedly struggle to trust the Lord. Yet that is what I must do above anything else. So while I put the finishing touches on this chapter of my life, I keep reminding myself that God is in control.
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