Ride from Hell or No exit

I know you have been there, if you ride public transportation like I do. You know how it is. The driver doesn't know where he/she is going. The bus or other means of transportation is too crowded and noisy. Then there is the smell! Oh my! It's enough to make you cry out for mercy.

This is my doom for the next two months or so....riding a stinky bus. I guess I shouldn't complain. It could be worse. I could be stranded. That's a scary thought. I should be grateful for everything, shouldn't I?

Yet, at times like this, I often wish that time would speed up and I didn't have to ride this stinky bus every day. As you can probably tell, I'm not a very patient person. I'm actually kind of spoiled. I like to have things a certain way and am rattled when they aren't.

Another year older

I celebrated a birthday last Thursday. I won't say how old I am. I'll just say that time has passed me by all too quickly. Some days I wish to be young again, and not have the responsibilities I now have. Other times I am content to be the age I am. They often say that with age comes wisdom. I don't believe that. A person can be young and wise, and then old and foolish.

I've been thinking a lot about worth and submission. I know that worth is in the eye of the beholder. You can't earn someone's respect when you're not willing to look past the feeling of unworthiness that washes over you. You have to submit to those above you, even when you feel that they are babbling nonsense.

Feeling trapped and treading water, she tried to make sense of it all.

Changes in time and place

Too many changes are taking place. They talk about bringing people in, but their actions prove otherwise. Who are these faceless people? They are those that talk of synergy and complacency: yet they don't practice themselves. All around the changes, none of them good, are happening. Are we all to be sucked in and not rally against the compacting of lives?

I often wonder what those who are in charge are thinking. They don't seem to care what's happening below them. They arbitrarily decide to radically change everything without any thought to what those changes will do. Yet, if they did take the time...maybe they would realize the impression they are creating...an impression that leaves me sick to my stomach. There seems to be nothing I can do about these changes. I can buck all I want, but it won't do any good. All I am left with is a sense of loss.

Did they expect everyone to fall in step and rally around them? Oh, Lord...I can't do that. I see too clearly what the next steps are down that slippery slope. I don't want to go there. I can't go there.

Time out

I need a time out. Everything seems to be going way too fast for me. Yes, I sometimes encourage this. Time drags. I feel useless and utterly spent trying to please everyone. It's an impossible task. As much as I would like to, there is only so much I can do. I need to stop complaining and start doing. Yes, I do feel the pressure. I see the pictures of death and destruction. I mourn for the many that have lost their lives.

I need a time out. Time to reflect about all that has happened, and the way our country is heading. It is scary. None of us likes being controlled by big government. Those that say they do are only fooling themselves into accepting what they feel they can't change.

I need a time out. Scary things are happening right and left. I can't process it. My mind feels numb. Is God still here? Yes. He is. I can rest on his unfailing love.